Keith Ballard Fodder

05Jul10

Keith Ballard taking a dirty cheap shot.

We hate this guy. As you will see in the first 2 points, not only is he an overpaid, overrated, and over hyped human being/player, but he is also a colossal determent to his own team. Enjoy. Ps. We hate Keith Ballard.

  1. Lets start it off with Ballard at his finest. His fine composure and his ability to really control his emotions are going to be a big addition to the Canucks to this year:
  2. Oh, lets not forget Ballards high offensive prowess. Check out this snipe show performance:
  3. You know its bad when even Sportsnet is making fun of you. What a joke this guy is.
  4. It must be said though that as much as we want to rip on the Canucks for overpaying up the ass to get Keith Ballard, that at least they are taking strides to be a better team. The San Jose Sharks lost their captain, starting goalie, and checking line center from last year and have done nothing to fill these holes. I know it always sucks to be a Sharks fan, but this doesn’t help.
  5. Rumor of the week: New feature to Sunday Fodder. We started this because I heard this rumor and could not stop laughing. 2 years ago when Robinho joined Manchester City, there is a huge rumor that he thought he was joining Manchester United as he did not realize there were 2 teams in Manchester. When he got there he then found out that he would not be playing in Champions League. Fast forward to present day, and Robinho is no longer with Man City. I’ll leave it up to you if you want to believe this or not.
  6. Pic of week: With Lakers head coach Philip Jackson returning to lead Kobe and crew to another three-peat, we thought we’d show some old school love to the Zen Master (hat tip to Omar)
  7. Quote of the Week: I tried to pick a line out of this but I just couldn’t. This guy just works Chris Bosh. Scroll down to point 8: CHRIS BOSH. This guy tears into him. Bosh getting owned
  8. Stat of the Week: Zero. As in the amount of playoff games Keith Ballard has played in his career. Zero, as in the amount of women he has probably slept with during that time as well.
  9. If you put a blonde wig on CBC World Cup Analyst Jason Devos, does he not look IDENTICAL to Kirsten Dunst?
  10. We here at the Jammer Blog are HUGE fans of one Casey Printers and are awaiting anxiously as he leads BC back to Grey Cup. Here is a clip that proves my point that NOTHING will stand in Casey’s way of leading us back to the promise land (:30 mark, BC/EDM Highlights) Casey the beast
  11. Remember that Nike: Write the Future ad I put on the blog a few weeks ago? Probably not, but whatever. Here is a nice follow up article to that commerical. Conspiracy? You better believe it!
  12. Hey Keith Ballard, F**K You.
  13. Final thought: The greatest off season in sports history has been an absolute dud so far. The biggest signing thus far in either the NHL or NBA might actually be Dan Hamhuis. Kovalchuk, Lebroner, Wade, Bosh, and Modano (throwing him in there because we think he might be coming to Detroit) have all remained unsigned.
  14. Those NBA Players who have signed (Paul Pierce, Dirk Nowitzki, and Joe Johnson) put us all back to sleep by re upping with their old teams. So here is my revolutionary idea: Free agents have ONE day to sign. After that, you’re stuck back where you were.
  15. Sounds stupid, I agree. But think: TV ratings would be through the roof, you’re teams fortune really only hangs in the balance for 1 day appose to a week or in Mats Sundin’s case, 5 months. And the best part is, this can definitely be done. Make July 1st the cut off date and allow for free agents to meet with teams prior to this date.
  16. What’s the worst that can happen? A team trades a prospect, pick, and player for a guy who scores on his own net and is a danger to his own teammates? Common, no GM would be that dumb
  17. Right?
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7 Responses to “Keith Ballard Fodder”

  1. 1 Micky Arison

    TSN is playing the classic role of jealous ex-girlfriend. Having nothin to offer my boy Bosh, they havta rip into him for enjoying the spotlight… which is obviously impossible on a shit team like the Raptors.

  2. 4 DetCapC19

    Actually, it stands for “The Sports Network”

  3. 7 Micky Arison

    Then you should know more than most… Toronto Sports Network.


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