With the first pick of the NBA Draft, the  Washington Wizards selected Kentucky PG John Wall. We here at The Jammer Blog are big fans of the said Wall, and immediately busted out the John Wall dance upon selection. We love John Wall the player (16.5PPG, 6.5 APG), the student (3.5 GPA), and the dancer (see below). Enjoy and don’t forget to jump on the bandwagon

Note: “The Pyramid Wall” might be to coolest one of them all.


That has to be the best name ever for a fodder doesn’t it? It’s that perfect combo of making you feel both curious and creepy simultaneously. It is rare that I call my own shot in the opening blurb, but I am letting you know now that point 5 is the greatest picture of the week OF ALL TIME. I will never find a better one. You will never see a better one. I’m going to even save you some time and tell you that after you see this picture, don’t even bother reading the rest of this brutal column because nothing will live up to the hilairiousness of this picture. Enjoy.

  1. Lets get right into it.
  2. According to several Jammer Blog sources, it is believed that this type of celebration is common place in the Pittsburgh Penguins locker room.
  3. Sticking with the soccer, this has to be the greatest shot of all time.
  4. My favourite part about this goal: Who comes across center and has the presence of mind to shoot?
  5. Picture of week: This picture was taken during a friendly soccer match between Nigeria and Germany. This actually happened and did not change for the ENTIRE GAME. Enjoy. (hat tip to Omar)
  6. Note: After posting this clip and posting this picture, I feel like I’m getting much edgier with my humour.
  7. Stat of the Week: Rasheed Wallace is the all time NBA leader in technical fouls with 304. I’m going on record right now and say that this record will last longer than any record Michael Jordan has. 304 is an embarrassingly impressive number. That adds up to approximately 290 points he has cost his team.
  8. Fun Fact: Rasheed Wallace’s middle name is “Abdul”. He legally changed it from “Antonio” to “Abdul” after his surprising 3 month marriage to pop singer, Paula Abdul. Weird eh?
  9. Quote of the week (via Twitter): “Brazil and the homie @realkaka doing theirr thing today”–Snoop Dogg
  10. Snoop Dogg and Kaka has to be weirdest “no reason for being friends other than we’re both famous” friendship of all time.
  11. Check out this funny pic sent to me from a diehard Mexican Soccer Fan (hat tip to Big Bert).
  12. Many people are trying to discredit Kobe Bryant’s 5th (and most impressive) championship by saying he didn’t have a great game 7 to seal the championship. 20 years from now all we will remember is that he had 23 points and 15 rebounds. Yes he may have a had a tough shooting night but he sunk 23 points on 23 shots and sealed the game with 2 free throws.
  13. Oh and FYI: Michael Jordan missed 20 shots in his last finals game which they won. Just saying.
  14. Note: You all totally believed that completely false “Fun Fact” about Rasheed  Wallace. Isn’t the internet amazing? You can start your own blog, make up facts about Rasheed Wallace, and people by default will probably believe them. Try it someday.
  15. There has been much talk of national anthems recently with Christina Aguilera doing a powerful rendition of Star Spangled Banner before Lakers/Celtics game 7 and of course the world cup where they sing both countries national anthems before the game. So in honor of this, I bring to you the worst, most disrespectful, and funniest national anthem of all time brought to you by weekly Jammer Blog reader, R Kelly
  16. My favourite parts by far are at the 0:50 mark where 2 people actually start dancing to the anthem and then at the 1:10 mark where R Kelly tries embarrassingly to get the crowd into it.
  17. Sticking with R Kelly, what has this guy been doing the last 10 years? He hasn’t had a number 1 hit since 2003 and I kid you not, he was indicted for more counts of child pornography than he’s released singles during that time (14). That HAS to be the definition of a career being over.
  18. Non sports thought of the week: I recently saw nude pictures of Rihanna. After seeing these pictures, I fully realized what Rihanna was talking about in the chorus of this track
  19. Final thought: Last night at the MMVA’s, Miley Cyrus took that much anticipated next step in her development: The step from pretty good looking to slutty hot. Generally there is a step in between called “classy hot”, but Miley for all of our pleasure, opted to forego that step and went straight to the good kinda hot. At this rate and given her potential, we here at the Jammer Blog feel she could end up challenging past greats such as the Olson Twins, Julia Roberts (Pretty Woman form), and Lisa LaFlamme as women who you don’t wanna say are hot, but totally are.
  20. The reason this has anything to do with sports is that after game 7 of the NBA Finals, Lakers big man Pau Gasol may have made that same jump (really good player, to one of the best players on the planet; he’s still an ugly bastard). 3 years with the Lakers–3 years in the NBA Finals and he’s got colossal numbers to boot (18 PPG, 15.5 RPG in LA’s last 2 wins when facing elimination).
  21. So now that Gasol’s a back to back champion and best big man in the league, Pau is starting to set his sights on much more elusive prize. And he apparently he doesn’t mind being a little obvious about it either. Have a great week everyone! Much love,


Kobe Bryant rapin again

Isn’t it funny that when Kobe Bryant gets awarded the coveted Fodder title this week it’s just his name, but when Lebron James gets it, it’s completely tied to his mom? I really believe this picture illustrates all of Lebron’s fantasies and is a metaphor for their relationship. Here are 19 points this week in honor of the amount of points Kobe scored in a row in the 3rd quarter.

  1. Has anyone seen Kobe Bryant’s player intro walk out? I have never seen one man personify the term “all business” so perfectly before in my entire life. I’m convinced that if he didn’t have to hi-5 his teammates, he wouldn’t
  2. For all you kids out there, this is how not to act when you score a basket:
  3. On a side note, if you have no life (like me) and you wanna get a good laugh, scroll down through some of the user comments on youtube for this clip. For some ungodly reason, people start getting extremely racist and it is absolutely uncalled for/hilarious.
  4. I’m sure we’ve all seen the Big Baby drool clip from game 4 of the NBA finals, but my favourite part of the whole thing is by far and away Ray Allen’s reaction to it. The look of disgust and embarrassment on his face is priceless.
  5. After setting an NBA record for 3 pointers in a finals game in game 2, Ray Allen broke another record in game 3, this time for futility as he tied to lowest shooting percentage (minimum 10 shots) in NBA Finals history.
  6. Note: Being called futile has to be right up there in the list of “things you never want to be called”. Others include “sterile”, “feeble”, and “Big Baby”.
  7. Sticking with our futile friend Raymond Allen, we have a fantastic Quote of the Week: “A successful person is one who can lay a firm foundation with the bricks that others throw at him. Ray Allen didn’t need anyone hurling bricks at him in Game 3 of the NBA Finals, he was doing just fine on his own”
  8. Stat of the week: Nick Lidstrom will be the 9th highest paid defenseman in the NHL next season. Ed Jovonoski, Brian Campbell, Jay Bouwemeester, and Wade Redden will all be earning more money than him.
  9. Note: Remember when this fodder used to be like 80% hockey? Funny how that number drastically dropped once the Wings went out.
  10. Picture of the week: Draw your on conclusions from this picture
  11. Rasheed Wallace has the best reactions in the history of the NBA. I’ve never seen anything like it. The best part is, he’s consistent. He looks like an absolute idiot, every single time. Check it (3:40 mark): 
  12. Toronto Raptors forward Hedo Turkoglu wants out of Toronto and apparently wants to go back to Sacramento.
  13. For those wondering, here was Hedo Turkoglu’s resume from this past season: Got paid 9 million dollars, averaged just over 11 points per game, at a standing height of 6-10 he managed to only grab 4 rebounds per game, shot a dismal 41% from the field, didn’t hit one game winning shot after hitting several in last years NBA playoffs, didn’t show up to a game because he was sick but was later seen out partying at a Toronto nightclub later that night, was moved to the bench at one point in the season because apparently 9 million dollars doesn’t buy you a starting forward anymore, and here’s the kicker: With the Raptors fighting for their playoff lives down the stretch, Turkoglu averaged a colossal 6 points per game in the final 5 games of the year as the Raptors missed the post season by 1 game.
  14. Seriously, who the hell is this guy to be making ANY demands as to where he wants to go?
  15. Retro Clip of the week: Arguably the greatest play in NBA history, not just because of the play itself, but the reaction by Larry Johnson. If you want the full context, by all means watch the entire 8 minute mini documentary on the play. If you just wanna do a quick hit it and quit it, fast forward to the 4:50 mark
  16. I hate Marian Hossa (Plug: Check back later this week for an article detailing why is he a douchebag)
  17. Last thought: This fodder started with Kobe, so it’s only fitting we end it with Kobe. This might be the best song ever. Actually what am I saying, it IS the best song ever. It’s Kobe Bryant rapping with Tyra Banks laying down the vocals for the chorus. The song is called K.O.B.E., because Kobe is the only man on the planet who can get a way with dedicating a whole rap song just to himself.
  18. The best line by far is at the start when Kobe spits out “Uh, what I live for? Basketball, beats, and broads”. I’m pretty sure he accomplished 2 of the 3 in a Colorado motel room not too long ago…
  19. Ladies and Gents, sit back and enjoy this track, as the Screech myster takes you home…

Ok I know this is an old clip, but I’m going to go on record and call this “The Greatest Youtube Clip of ALL TIME”.  Here are Jammers’ favourite parts about this clip:

1) Booker T’s reaction to the whole thing. Right when he says it, he knows exactly what he said

2) The chick standing behind Booker T laughing after he says it.

3) How jacked up both those guys are. It’s literally as if they both roided up before this interview.

4) The idea that nobody is really sure if Booker T broke character or not when he said it. Did he say it as Booker T or did he say it as a thugged out black dude who literally wants to beat the crap out of Hulk Hogan?

5) The fact that nobody knows what the hell Booker T is talking about prior to him calling out Hogan.

6) Imagining the interaction between Booker T and Hulk Hogan right after this went down.

7) Trying to figure out how Mean Gene (the white guy) and Stevie Ray (the other way too jacked up black guy) didn’t start laughing their ass off right when this happend.

Enjoy. Much love,

The Jammer Blog

Is douchebaggery a word? Probably not, but that hasn’t stopped us before. This picture should say it all, but we’ll feel free to expand on it in Point#1 to provide you the detail and analysis that you demand. We went with 22 thoughts this week to pay homage to the 22 fans who renewed their season tickets for Coyotes Hockey next season.

  1. Gary Bettman is a douchebag. Moving on…
  2. Ever wonder what Gary Bettman’s email account would look like? Click me (hat tip to DetCapC19)
  3. Ever wonder why Chris Pronger never gets suspended nearly as bad as he should? Or why everyone on the Penguins seems to get off easy? Or why the NHL is such a joke? Or why Bettman is such an idiot? Or why I can’t stop crying? Check it
  4. Do you remember a few weeks ago when I posted that Montreal Canadiens track “Feels like 93”?. Well, given that they went 1-4 after that song came out and were absolutely dominated by the Flyers, here is an updated version of the smash hit
  5. Note: The best part BY FAR is at the 1:40 mark. Way too funny.
  6. Picture of week: This might be the coolest way to celebrate a Stanley Cup victory: Martin St. Louis
  7. Quote of week: “If there are Yankees [Derek Jeter] who want to help us, we would involve them”–New York Knicks GM Donnie Walsh, on recruiting Lebron James to New York
  8. So to recap, Chicago as Obama helping them. The Knicks have Derek Jeter helping them. The Nets have Jay Z. And the Cavs have Delonte West.
  9. Jeez, even before West bagged Lebron’s mom, this wasn’t a fair fight.
  10. Stat of week: Tuesday night will mark the 4th time in the last 3 seasons that Marian Hossa has played a game with the Stanley Cup in the building. He is currently 0-3 in those games and has no even strength points while attempting only 5 shots combined over those 3 contests. Its literally as if the Cup has some type of Kryptonite effect on the guy.
  11. Hockey Night in Canada anchor Ron Maclean was out eating lunch with Don Cherry when he saw a man drowning in the Delaware River. He then proceeded to run to the water and go save the man.
  12. This begs the question: How unbearable is a lunch with Don Cherry when one feels that the alternative of jumping into a freezing cold river, with your clothes on, to save a drowning man you do not know, knowing full well you may drown yourself, is a better option than being at that table?
  13. Greatest sports impression ever? Probably over exaggerating as usual, but this Aries Spears impression of Shaq is absolutely mint. The cartoon is kind of funny, but the impression is what you wanna see:
  14. Sticking with basketball, I started playing Franchise Mode in NBA 2k2 on my Sega Dreamcast the other day and at pick 21 in the fantasy roster draft, I got Michael Jordan. I know its the “Washington Wizards” Michael Jordan and by 2002 he was a severe shadow of his former self, but I stand by the fact that anytime you have a chance to get Michael Jordan in the number 21 spot in a fantasy draft, you take it and it has to be deemed a steal.
  15. Honestly, how creepy is Pierre Maguire? I’m willing to throw down a 20 that Big Buff doesn’t do another interview within 10 feet of Maguire.
  16. Sticking with the keywords of “Maguire” and “Creepy” here is a great spoof which poses a question that all of us have thought of at least once:
  17. How pissed off did Rob Ray look in that video? For those wondering, Rob Ray had over 3,000 NHL penalty minutes in his career. So yes, that is the last guy you want to piss off.
  18. Jammer’s World Cup Prediction: No country that calls it “soccer” will win the tournament.
  19. Rio, Ballack, Drogba, Beckham, Essien, Mikel, Adriano, Ronaldo (fat one, not Cristiano), Totti, and Ronaldinho. These are the 10 most well known names that will not be at the World Cup this year (6 due to injury; 4 of the injured 6 happen to play for Chelsea).
  20. Alright, I’m just gonna come out and say what all of us severely fringe soccer fans, who only become “die hards” when the World Cup is on, are thinking: This tournament is gonna blow.
  21. Final thought: This NBA Final has the potential to be one of the best ever. Last 2 champions, the best team rivalry in all of sports (sorry Sox/Yanks), and the chance to see greatness taken to another level if Kobe can win this series. We here at the Jammer Blog have a strong allegiance to the Lakers and think that Kobe Bryant can do no wrong (even in a hotel room with an underage girl in Colorado). So we leave the last point to an image that sums up what all of us are thinking:

Is it wrong that Lebron’s mom made more headlines this week than Lebron himself? Nope. It’s stuff like this that keeps terrible blogs like this running. We pay homage to Lebron’s mom this week because it appears the only thing easier than her might be the cheap laughs I get off making fun of her this week. Enjoy.

1.  Free agents Lebron James, Dwayne Wade, Chris Bosh, and Joe Johnson are all going to meet to discuss their free agency plans this off season. Here’s my guess as to how it will go down

2.  Lebron: “I’m going to Chicago”. Bosh: “I call playing with Lebron”. Wade: “Crap, I’m stuck with Johnson”

3.  Speaking of Lebroner, go to Google and google “Lebron James Delonte West Mother”

4.  Now that you’ve read all the million different articles and watched the multiple youtube clips, I will give you 10 minutes to laugh hysterically before continuing on to the rest of the column.

5.  Why would West even do this? I mean I know it would be pretty sick to say you bagged Lebron’s mom, but according to several Jammer Blog sources we can confirm that she is NOT a MILF. I’m gonna even venture to say that Lebron might even be better looking…

6.  If you include both on and off court activity, West must’ve lead the NBA in scoring this postseason. Easy.

7.  In all seriousness however, this whole situation might be the last straw that makes Lebron pull out of Cleveland.

8.  Let’s hope West did the same thing.

9.  When Kobe Bryant gives this face they should just stop the game. It is the most ominous face in the history of Pro Basketball and the other team has literally no chance of winning.

10. Speaking of Kobe, did anyone else see his performance in game 6 of the Phoenix series? There were times where he was literally wearing Grant Hill and still making shots. Nobody has mastered the double pump fake, turn around fade away 3 point jumper, with the shot clock winding down, with 2 guys on him, like Kobe Bryant has. Nobody.

11. Best part about those shots: He generally has like 4 teammates open and he still believes that the shot he’s taking is a much better option.

12. Quote of the week: “Mike Richards could be a difference maker in this year’s Stanley Cup Final”—Bob McKenzie from TSN

13. Sticking with TSN, they are over killing this final. Every day there’s a new piece on some fringe player in this series, and everyday there’s a new “potential difference maker” who could “turn this series around” if “he gets himself going”. They’re becoming a colossal joke, with Bob McKenzie leading the way with his size 84 waist line.

14. Stat of the week: The Boston Celtics have been to 20 NBA Finals. They have won 17 of them.

15. Picture of the week: Looks like Lebron’s mom wasn’t the only one getting nailed…click me

16. Sidney Crosby signed the most lucrative endorsement contract in the history of the NHL. What was the deal you ask? 10 million. Over 7 years.

17. I’d pay 10 million up front to never see Crosby like this over the next 7 years: click at own risk

18. Chris Pronger goes to Edmonton and they make the finals the first year. He leaves Edmonton, and they haven’t made the playoffs since. Pronger goes to Anaheim and they win the Stanley Cup his first year. He leaves Anaheim, and they miss the playoffs. Pronger goes to Philadelphia and they make the finals the first year. At what point do you sign this guy to a lifetime deal?

19. Sticking with Pronger, Flyers legend Bobby Clarke has already said that Pronger’s the best defenseman in Flyers history. Pretty high praise after one year on the job.

20. Can you imagine if you’re Tom Brady and you’re reading this?  His options are to stay in bed with his hot wife or to submit himself to this Defense. If I’m Brady, I take the easier score and stay in bed.

21. The Calgary Flames have announced that they will not be moving Jarome Iginla or firing GM Darryl Sutter. I guess if it ain’t broke don’t fix it….

22. Remember last week when I said “it was painfully obvious when the Magic knew that the Celtitcs were better than them”? Let’s just say I would’ve stopped writing this blog had the Magic come back and won that series.

23. Final thought: My boyhood idol Steve Yzerman has left the Red Wings to pursue a GM job with the Tampa Bay Lightning. This really has the “when your son leaves for college” feel. You want him to do well, you’re not overly sure if he will because he’s embarking on such a large challenge, and it’ll be the first time he’s away from home. Nevertheless, everywhere Yzerman goes, winning seems to follow. So we here at the Jammer Blog have a bold prediction: The Tampa Bay Lightning will win a cup within the next 5 years.

24. And the Red Wings will win the other 4.

Much love,

The Jammer Blog.

As I sat down last night to watch the Lost series finale, I prepped myself for a 1 hour finale that was sure to answer all the questions they had set up for 6 years. I soon realized that it would be longer than an hour, so I assumed I’d be sitting here for 2 hours. Sure enough, this finale didn’t wanna end, and after 2.5 hours of watching the finale, the show ended. The finale reminded me a lot of this article. You just want the column to end, and when you get to point 15 you’re like “crap there’s still 10 more points this guy has to go through”. One thing I can promise you is this: It wont take you 2.5 hours to read this, but it’ll sure as hell feel like it. Enjoy 🙂

  1. The Canadian men’s soccer team will play a friendly soccer match against Argentina on May 24th.
  2. This is the soccer equivalent of the whole Lawrence Taylor saga, with Argentina being LT and Canada being the 16 year old girl. Saddest part is the 16 year old girl prolly had a better chance of saving her dignity than the Canadians do.
  3. ESPN will be in a constant state of arousal for the next 38 days. Or I as like to call it, a permanent state of Lebroner
  4. Stickin with Lebron, the New Jersey Nets are officially the first team out of the Lebron James sweepstakes as lottery balls rolled out of their favor and dropped them from the 1st overall pick to the number 3 slot in this June’s NBA draft. After losing 70 games this season, the Nets may have just been dealt their biggest blow of the year, 6 weeks before the offseason even begins.
  5. On a side note, I found the NBA draft lottery to be much more entertaining when the Vancouver Grizzlies were in it every year getting screwed out of the first overall pick.
  6. The only thing more desperate than this might be the Sharks themselves: Here
  7. I also had no idea Joe Thornton went by the alias “biscuit”
  8. Lance Armstrong is being accused of using steroids. In other news, Tiger Woods enjoys casual sex.
  9. Stat of week: Remove the Miami Heat (2006) and Philadelphia 76ers (1983) and only six teams have won the last 28 NBA championships (Lakers, Celtics, Pistons, Spurs, Rockets, Bulls). Ladies and gentlemen, parity at its finest.
  10. 10 time NBA champion and Los Angeles Lakers head coach Phil Jackson has accused Jammer blog favourite, Steve Nash, of carrying the ball when he dribbles (for those of you wondering, this is illegal). This prompted Nash to give us this:
  11. Quote of week: “The best coach in the league, Gregg Popovich, didn’t seem to have a problem with it”.  Ouch.
  12. Picture of the week: Who’s the Boss in this picture? Click me
  13. Best commercial ever? Yes I know I say this EVERY week. But this one is a tough one to argue against. It’s even got a cameo from the Queen herself (Elizabeth, not Latifah)
  14. Chris Bosh has narrowed down his list to 5 teams he would like to play for: New York Knicks, Miami Heat, Chicago Bulls, Los Angeles Lakers, and Toronto Raptors. Cue this song:
  15. As Cookie Monster so eloquently asks, can you figure out which one it is? I’ll give you a hint: this team sucks and its located in Canada
  16. PS. How brutal does Cookie Monster look now? Old age has caught up to this guy. I honestly thought he was gonna die half way through that song.
  17. Non Sports thought of the week: “Please don’t tell me how Lost ended last night. I’m up to the point where they discover a hatch”–Conan O’Brien on twitter
  18. I’m gonna use this spot here to shower some dap to Jammer Blog favourite Pavel Datsyuk for taking home the Top Forward Award at the World Championships.
  19. Sticking with the Championships, can someone please tell me what purpose Evgeni Malkin served this year? He did nothing for the Pens before the Olympics. Did nothing at the Olympics. Did even less for the Pens after the Olympics. Was almost as invisible as Crosby was in that Montreal series. And now he pulled a no show at the World Championships. Seriously, why did this guy even bother getting up in the morning this year?
  20. Irony of the week: Both the Orlando Magic and Cleveland Cavaliers retooled and built their teams this season to beat each other (Magic, see Vince Carter. Cavs, see Antwan Jamison). Unfortunately they never got the chance to play each other because neither of em built a team that could beat the Celtics. The Cavs didn’t have anyone to guard Kevin Garnett (see Antwan Jamison) and there isn’t a warm body on the Magic who has the ability to stay between Rajon Rondo and the basket.
  21. There comes a point in every series when everyone knows who the better team is. In the cases of Magic and Cavs, it was painfully obvious on their faces when they realized neither of em could beat Boston.
  22. Final thought: After six years on the air, Lost had its series finale on Sunday which I’m assuming broke every single TV ratings record. It’s amazing how long ago 6 years is. Think about it: Both Ovechkin and Crosby weren’t in the NHL 6 years ago. Brian Burke was still with the Canucks. Peyton Manning hadn’t won a superbowl. Kobe Bryant had never won an MVP award. The Phoenix Coyotes were actually making money. Bryant Reeves was still being paid by the Vancouver Grizzlies. And most notably, Tiger Woods was keeping it in the pants.
  23. It’s amazing how much can change over a 6 year time period. My prediction for the next 6 years?

Have a great week everyone!

“You may make it. You may not. But that doesn’t matter, Jammer. What matters is that you’re here. Look around. Who ever thought you’d make it this far. 1..2..3.. triple deke. Take your best shot. I believe in you Jammer. Win or lose.”–Gordon Bombay, pumping me up before my latest sports fodder.

1.  I defy you to watch this video and not sing along by the end of it. It can’t be done. And if you weren’t on the Habs bandwagon before, you certainly are now (tip to DetCapC19 for the clip):

2.  Note: I keep wondering if Canuck fans should be cheering for the Habs. I mean, the Nucks for the last 3 years have been Canada’s best shot at ending the country’s Stanley Cup drought, and have constantly failed to come close. Montreal on the other hand, gets into the playoffs on the last day of the season with an Overtime loss, and are now only 8 wins away. If the Habs win, wont Canuck fans just be a little bit bitter?

3.  Quote of the week: “They were banging away in front, and Sidney Crosby couldn’t get it up”–CBC announcer Bob Cole, referring to Sidney Crosby in game 7

4.  I wonder if Jaroslav Halak was naked, if Crosby’s fate would’ve been a little bit different…

5.  After turing 22 years old and earning tens of millions of dollars over his NHL career, Sidney Crosby has finally decided to move out of Mario Lemieux’s house and into his own place.

6.  One of three things must’ve happened here: 1) Lemieux kicked him out after his no show in the Montreal series. 2) Crosby finally grew a pair and moved out after 4 years. Or 3) Crosby made a pass at Lemieux

7.  And lets be honest, you’d be pretty shocked if it was number 2.

8.  My new hero: This man might be an idiot. This man might need to let go of his past. This man appears to be heading straight for prison. This man on the surface, appears to be an absolute joke of a human being. But despite all of his faults, I commend this man for attempting (and for good amount of time, achieving) something all of us past our prime high school athletes have dreamt about at least once. livin’ the dream

9.   My favourite line from the article: “He was totally dedicated to basketball”. If you’re a 22 year old man, imposing as a 16 year old high school student just so you can relive your basketball hey day, you better be “totally dedicated to basketball”.

10. I wonder what happened at school dances. Was he grinding up with 15-16 year old girls? If so, this man will have quickly moved from “hero” to “God status”.

11. Note: Somewhere in a max security prison, Lawrence Taylor is reading this blog and a light bulb just went off in his head.

12. Meet Sami Salo’s new best friend: Ouch

13. Stat of the week: 15: The amount of wins over the last 2 years that Lebron James has in the playoffs. Do some quick arithmetic and you realize that he was 17 wins short the last 2 years from winning a championship. That’s not even close.

14. David Beckham has only played in 30 games for the LA Galaxy since his arrival in August of 2007. So in other words, he has been to more Laker games as a spectator than he’s been to Galaxy games as a player. That 250 million dollar deal is looking more and more worth it every day.

15. Picture of the week: Put a Celtics jersey on any of these guys, and 20 says they shut down Shaq

16. Remember my article about Upsets being bad for sports (see here)? Well after Lebron and the Cavs flamed out in round 2, an article came out illustrating another great reason why upsets are killer for great potential sports moments

17. Toronto Raptors head coach Jay Triano was at Game 3 of the Canucks/Blackhawks series. When they put him up on the big screen, nobody knew who he was. Once they put up his job title, the whole place start booing like crazy. That’s Rough. (tip to Alberto)

18. Roberto Luongo let in 16 goals at GM Place in the 2nd round series vs. the Blackhawks. He had so many holes; even Tiger Woods didn’t know what to do with em.

19. Is this the best spoof commercial of all time? I rank it right up there with Sami Salo (link) and that underrated Burger King spoof on Pizza Hut (tip to DetCapC19). 

20. Sticking with Gordon Bombay, has there even been a bigger hypocrite in movie history? All he talks about is his famous “triple deke”, which he never actually scored on. The guy’s more a fraud than the dude from point 8.

21. Final Thought:This week we reserved the most revered and coveted spot in Sunday fodder for the U21 Richmond Pilots Women’s Soccer Team. Why the hell would I talk about this? Why the hell would any of you care? Both good questions which I don’t really have an answer to. Nevertheless, the greatest women’s soccer team in the history of my hometown won their first Provincial title on Saturday morning. In true authentic soccer fashion, the game ended 1-0.

22. After the game I got to thinking: Aside from volleyball, is there a hotter female sport than soccer? Female kicks trumps basketball, hockey, baseball, and most definitely golf. You could argue tennis, but those grunting noises are really hit or miss for me (example of miss). Soccer also has the added advantage of having 22 girls on the field at a time. Nothing comes close to that.

23. So to my favourite girls from Richmond, congratulations on the big win! And the next time you see some creepy guy at your games, be nice to him because there’s a good chance he read this blog.

24. Or be nice to him, because there’s a good chance that creepy guy is me.

With the Vancouver Canucks wilting away in front of their home fans on Tuesday Night, it got me thinking. For the last 4 years, no team has taken as much heat as the San Jose Sharks for their horrifying playoff struggles. While I believe this is fair, I began to wonder why the Canucks aren’t in the same boat. Both teams have been extremely successful during the 82 game regular season, but prior to this year, have failed to accumulate more than 6 wins in any of the previous 3 playoff years. Lets take a closer look at the 2 teams success over the last 4 years:

Year San Jose Sharks Vancouver Canucks
2007 Regular Season: 51 wins, 107 points, #5 Seed in the West

Playoffs: Lost in round 2 to Detroit in 6 games.

Regular Season: 49 wins, 105 points, #3 Seed in the West (Division Winner)

Playoffs: Lost in round 2 to Anaheim in 5 games

2008 Regular Season: 49 wins, 108 points, #2 Seed in the West

Playoffs: Lost in round 2 to Dallas in 6 games.

Regular Season: 39 wins, 88 points, #11 Seed in the West (Out of Playoffs)

Playoffs: N/A

2009 Regular Season: 53 wins, 117 points, #1 Seed in the West (Best record in NHL)

Playoffs: Lost in round 1 to Anaheim in 6 games.

Regular Season: 45 wins, 100 points, #3 Seed in the West (Division Winner)

Playoffs: Lost in round 2 to Chicago in 6 games

2010 Regular Season: 51 wins, 113 points, #1 Seed in the West

Playoffs: Advanced to round 3 after defeating Detroit in 5 games.

Regular Season: 49 wins, 103 points, #3 Seed in the West (Division Winner)

Playoffs: Lost in round 2 to Chicago in 6 games

As we can see from the last 4 years, aside from 2008, both teams have had comparable  seasons. Vancouver has won their division 3 of the 4 years, as has San Jose. Both teams have reached the 100 point plateau every year they have qualified for the playoffs. Vancouver has had home ice advantage in 4/6 series’ they’ve played in the last 4 years, while San Jose has had home ice advantage in 5/7.

These two teams are also comparable in the sense that each of their franchise players has been much maligned, and often times the reason as deemed by the public, for their respective teams playoff failures. San Jose’s Joe Thornton and Vancouver’s Roberto Luongo have taken the majority of the heat when their teams have not reached playoff expectations. Both won a gold medal for Canada at Olympics, yet have failed to find any success in the NHL when it has mattered most.

As the Sharks exercised many of their demons in their 5 game series win over the two time defending Western Conference Champion Detroit Red Wings, perhaps the moniker of “playoff underachievers” will now be lifted off of their shoulders and onto those of the Vancouver Canucks. In a demanding city where hockey is life, and life is hockey, expectations are always high, and 6 wins per post season doesn’t cut it.

But for all the Canuck fans out there, I leave you with a stat that if nothing else, will put a smile on your face:

The last time the Maple Leafs won more than 6 games in a playoff, Patrick Kane was 13 years old.

Lemme know if you agree or disagree or just wanna leave your opinion! Much love.

I think I might’ve cried more than Sami Salo did after I watched this video.

Best part is, you know Salo is thinking the EXACT same thing. Enjoy. Laugh.